The Battle I Never Saw Coming...

I was never ready to talk about this... until now. Complex Regional Pain Syndrome (CRPS) is a rare disease and is one of the most excruciating chronic pain conditions known. I have been struggling and living with CRPS caused from knee injury in September 2021. I will discuss all of my highs and my lowest of lows through this ongoing journey. The hope I have is that my experience will help anyone who lives with chronic pain and give them hope for a positive future.

September 2021 I had an unfortunate knee injury and I was bummed to learn that I would be in a brace for 2 months with Physical Therapy. Little did I know that 2 months would turn into a journey with no end in sight.

I started Physical therapy in October 2021and my hopes were high. I thought, "This is great, I will have a month of PT and then I will be good to go!". After my first two visits, I realized the therapist I was working with had an extremely aggressive approach, one that did not seem to be helping and after 2 weeks, my knee began to feel worse than before my injury. I could not bend my knee anymore at this point and I was becoming frustrated and depressed that this course of treatment was prolonging my injury. After getting a second opinion and changing Physical Therapy facilities, I went in with a positive attitude that things would get better.... My once high hopes were again crushed.

December 15, 2021 6:31pm... A day, and time which will be forever engrained in my mind, a day that changed everything...

This was the beginning of not only a physical battle but also an emotion/mental battle that would change every aspect of my life.... As a soccer player for over 20 years, I am no stranger to pain, however this was a pain I could never have imagined I would feel. A feeling of 1,000 knives stabbing you 24/7 making it unbearable for anything to touch your skin, feeling like you are on fire from the inside out. That is what I was feeling in this photo in addition to fear, anxiety, depression and anger, all of feelings overtook my body. By December 28, 2021, this is what my knee looked like....

At this point, I was in complete panic mode. Why is my left leg completely discolored and swollen? Why can't I touch my skin without wanting to scream in pain? Why is my leg throbbing constantly? What is wrong with me?

These were the questions that were going through my head, these were the questions i was asking the Doctor. These were the questions that had no answers. And just a few short weeks later January 13, 2022... I became immobile and looked like this...

My journey was far from over... No one could have prepared me for what was to come and what I would have to go through. I would have three options that I fought myself over... Amputate my leg, end it all because I was going to succumb to the pain and allow this unknown pain to win or FIGHT for answers and come out of this on top....

Thank you for reading so far! More to come... #crpswarrior #undefeated